For the last 4 years, I have given something up for Lent. Having been raised in the Baptist Church, we did not observe Lent in the same way the Methodist Church does, where I find myself presently. The first year after Ken and I got married, I didn't "observe or participate" in Lent because I felt I had already given up something....being a Baptist! However, the next year I found myself eager to give something up. That first year, I gave up chocolate. Anyone that knows me knows that I am a lover of ALL THINGS CHOCOLATE! The next year, chocolate again! I really do love my sweets, but I am not sure that it felt like a huge sacrifice to me. Last year, I gave up ALL sweets and I really thought I was giving up something major.
This year, I went in a different direction. I am always striving for a deeper, closer relationship with God. I never want to stop growing in that relationship....the most important one I will EVER nurture. So, this year I asked God to speak to my heart and let me know what He thought I should give up. I was very surprised by what He laid on my heart (and so quickly too!).
I have given up Facebook for Lent. I didn't go into this lightly. I love Facebook for a lot of reasons. I love to read all of the encouraging things my friends post. I love scriptures that Ms. Helen puts up every single morning. I love seeing pictures of my grandchildren. And, just to be completely honest, I love Bingo Blitz. But, I have given it up for these 40 days and I am okay with that!
After our Ash Wednesday service at church, I was happy to see that once we got home, I didn't begin to suffer any Facebook withdrawals. I didn't get on the computer at all. I found myself studying the Word more. I am reading the books that I have bought for inspiration and encouragement. I am digging so deep to figure out who God wants me to be. I am talking to my Father in heaven a lot more.
Yesterday, I took my 9 year old daughter to two different nursing homes and she handed out her hand made valentines. The smiles on the faces of all those precious senior citizens warmed my heart and thrilled Nevaeh. We stopped at an apartment complex and she went to the door to give a couple of women her valentines and they hugged her and thanked her profusely. Our last delivery was to my little granddaughter Riley in Clarksville and then we had lunch together. We discussed why we give up things for Lent along with a myriad of other topics.
As we were returning to Erin, Nevaeh asked me if her Papa would be home when we got there. Ken had been at a meeting and then had some Valentine deliveries of his own to make in Clarksville, so I told her he would not be home for awhile. She seemed saddened by this. She then dropped a bomb on me. "I really wish Papa was going to be home. I really want to go to the park and I know you like to rest in your room in the afternoons." WOW! Usually, after we home school, I do retreat to my room for some alone time and I am usually on my computer on......you got it, FACEBOOK!
When we did get home, Nevaeh went upstairs and I sat in my recliner thinking....this is the time that I would probably be on facebook, reading and responding to posts. But at that moment, God spoke to my heart and told me, "Take your daughter to the park!" It was a lovely day, the type we do not often see in February. I called her down and when I said "Let's go to the park," she was overjoyed. We walked hand in hand to the park and played for an hour and then over to the library.
Last night, before Nevaeh went up to bed, she brought me a little Valentine bag. Inside there was a beautiful handmade card with the red ribbon I had put in her hair that morning. She had put a red heart sticker on the outside and on the inside she wrote...."Thank you mommy for making this the best Valentine's Day ever!" She also included a valentine sucker (since you did give up chocolate too, mommy!) and a little plastic heart that had a little silver bracelet in it of hers.
Moments like that come along rarely in life. When your child, gives up their "treasures" for you out of love, you see God in those moments. I would have missed that and more yesterday if I had ONLY given up chocolate.
Every year, Lent becomes something MORE for me. This year, yes, I gave up two things....Facebook and chocolate. But, it is NOT really about what you are giving up....it is about what you gain! I thank God for all He is showing me and what is yet to come.
Even though I will share my blog and all of my friends and family will see it from Facebook, realize that I am not on there. I am really going cold turkey here.....I am loving Lent!
Friday, February 15, 2013
Saturday, February 9, 2013
Love Letters
As we draw closer to Valentine's Day, many women are getting that downright giddy feeling of anticipation. "Is he going to send me flowers?" or "Will he pick out a beautiful piece of jewelry?" or even, "I hope he remembers!"
Valentine's Day is a special day for many. It is the "official" day of love. I have a dear friend that said something years ago that made me see this holiday in a totally different light! I worked with a young man named Michael and he lived with his single mom and two sisters. They were and continue to be a loving, close knit family. As Michael and I were having lunch so long ago, it was almost Valentine's Day and I asked him if he was going to be doing anything special for his mom and sisters and I will NEVER forget what he said.
"I like to do special things for my mom and sisters all year. Valentine's Day is just a day on the calendar for loser guys that don't do nice things for their women all year long." I had to admit, he was right. I do love Valentine's Day, mostly through my daughter's eyes....she lights up when she gets flowers delivered. Even so, her Papa does special things for her all throughout the year.
This week, I received a Love Letter a little early. I opened the envelope and it was a single sheet of notebook paper, handwritten, all in red ink and it is and forever shall be a cherished treasure. The first part of the letter was from my mother and it reads....(anything in parenthesis or capitalized is Mom's):
To My Baby Girl Julia Whom I'm so proud to say, "I'm Julia's Mom. Please always remember that! This should probably be taped to your bathroom mirror where you could read t everyday.YOU may not realize it Julia, but it is 100% true.
1. There are at least 2 people in this world that would die for you.
2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way. (many more)
3, The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you. (oh yes!)
4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.
5. Every night SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
6. You mean the world to someone.
7. You are SPECIAL and UNIQUE!
8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.
9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it. (Right?)
10.When you think the world has turned its back on you, take another look! (A loving command from Mom)
11. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.
God loves you Julia, and so does your Mom, very much. God Bless. Now start and continue to write. You have much to say and give through your writing.
And then at the bottom, yet another love letter:
Good morning Julia, this is God, Creator and Owner of the entire Universe. I will be handling ALL your problems today. I won't need your help. Ok? So go have a nice day.
Love,
Your Father God
After I finished reading this my heart was so full. All of the love that my mom has for me, she wrote out on paper. It means so much in this particular season of her life because mother is getting older and she tires easily, has arthritis and sometimes it's hard for her to write. I realize that there is NOTHING that I really want or need that could top what mother gave me for Valentine's Day.
I pick up my Bible and read and study each day because my mother FIRST did the same. I go to church and serve God because my mother did FIRST. The first LOVE LETTER I ever received was that little rainbow Bible placed in my hands with Jesus sitting on a stone with all of the little children gathered around Him.
So, as Valentine's Day gets closer and closer.....many men will find themselves out searching for just the right gift and I know that their wives or girlfriends will love and appreciate whatever was chosen for them. As for me, I will read and reread this love letter from mother and when I see that red ink, I will think of Christ, shedding His precious blood for me. I will hug the Scripture closer to me....because It is and forever will be the greatest Love Letter ever written!
Valentine's Day is a special day for many. It is the "official" day of love. I have a dear friend that said something years ago that made me see this holiday in a totally different light! I worked with a young man named Michael and he lived with his single mom and two sisters. They were and continue to be a loving, close knit family. As Michael and I were having lunch so long ago, it was almost Valentine's Day and I asked him if he was going to be doing anything special for his mom and sisters and I will NEVER forget what he said.
"I like to do special things for my mom and sisters all year. Valentine's Day is just a day on the calendar for loser guys that don't do nice things for their women all year long." I had to admit, he was right. I do love Valentine's Day, mostly through my daughter's eyes....she lights up when she gets flowers delivered. Even so, her Papa does special things for her all throughout the year.
This week, I received a Love Letter a little early. I opened the envelope and it was a single sheet of notebook paper, handwritten, all in red ink and it is and forever shall be a cherished treasure. The first part of the letter was from my mother and it reads....(anything in parenthesis or capitalized is Mom's):
To My Baby Girl Julia Whom I'm so proud to say, "I'm Julia's Mom. Please always remember that! This should probably be taped to your bathroom mirror where you could read t everyday.YOU may not realize it Julia, but it is 100% true.
1. There are at least 2 people in this world that would die for you.
2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way. (many more)
3, The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you. (oh yes!)
4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.
5. Every night SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
6. You mean the world to someone.
7. You are SPECIAL and UNIQUE!
8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.
9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it. (Right?)
10.When you think the world has turned its back on you, take another look! (A loving command from Mom)
11. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.
God loves you Julia, and so does your Mom, very much. God Bless. Now start and continue to write. You have much to say and give through your writing.
And then at the bottom, yet another love letter:
Good morning Julia, this is God, Creator and Owner of the entire Universe. I will be handling ALL your problems today. I won't need your help. Ok? So go have a nice day.
Love,
Your Father God
After I finished reading this my heart was so full. All of the love that my mom has for me, she wrote out on paper. It means so much in this particular season of her life because mother is getting older and she tires easily, has arthritis and sometimes it's hard for her to write. I realize that there is NOTHING that I really want or need that could top what mother gave me for Valentine's Day.
I pick up my Bible and read and study each day because my mother FIRST did the same. I go to church and serve God because my mother did FIRST. The first LOVE LETTER I ever received was that little rainbow Bible placed in my hands with Jesus sitting on a stone with all of the little children gathered around Him.
So, as Valentine's Day gets closer and closer.....many men will find themselves out searching for just the right gift and I know that their wives or girlfriends will love and appreciate whatever was chosen for them. As for me, I will read and reread this love letter from mother and when I see that red ink, I will think of Christ, shedding His precious blood for me. I will hug the Scripture closer to me....because It is and forever will be the greatest Love Letter ever written!
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
Teach Us All Lord
The majority of the time, I stay away from commenting on political issues...I have learned, especially after this presidential election, people can be VERY serious about their politics. The truth is, I couldn't get on Facebook even one day, for the better part of last year, without being bombarded with attack ads on both candidates and it always bothered me. The naive child inside of me just wanted to see a nice, clean well run election....no arguing, just their individual platforms and then allow each and every person to go out and rock the vote!
Well, it didn't happen that way and I made the mistake of making a comment on a post and it caused what I considered an all out "free for all." So, I stepped away and have been very careful since then.
However, I find myself in a territory again that I don't enjoy visiting...but sometimes, it is a necessity. If I have learned one thing, I do not act or react based on MY own feelings. I do give the Holy Spirit full control though....a lesson that took many years to learn. Obedience to my God is way more important to me than how any human being feels or thinks about me. That being said, brings us to the here and now.
I was reading some posts on Facebook last night and as always, there are several thing posted that I just pass without even bothering to comment. (Holy Spirit at work again, let me tell ya!) But, then I come upon a picture that I see...and I continue to look at it and read the sign the man in the picture is holding. I struggle with what my soul is speaking to me.....but, I have also learned to "wait upon the Lord" because I have noticed when I shoot off at the mouth, I tend to make a mess of things. The sign the man was holding read:
"Don't spread my wealth...spread my work ethic."
I sat for several minutes after having read it and did a little inner battle with the Holy Spirit, because I just thought "God is on the throne....He can handle this." And then it just didn't go away.....that is how I always know that I am being prompted to write...and I never feel they are my words, but His!
Personally, I feel that this statement goes against EVERYTHING that I believe in. Before I get mauled to death....understand I am not saying for anyone to go out and give away everything that you have. I do get that people work very hard for their money. That said, we are not all given the same chances in life. There are people struggling with drug addiction. Do we know why? What is their story? Were they abused? Did they grow up in a home where drug use was an everyday occurrence? We have single parents living in public housing with children. Some are bettering themselves by attending college and working toward a goal, while others are trapped in the never ending cycle of poverty they were raised in. WHATEVER the reason someone is not as fortunate as me is a non issue as far as I am concerned.
You see, years ago, I was one of those women. I lived in public housing. I was on food stamps. I was on government insurance. I struggled to make ends meet. I had lost my job, my home, my car...everything. I was married at the time and my then husband had lost his job too. There were times that I took my little baby I had adopted and cleaned apartments that people had abandoned in housing, just to take money off of our rent for the month. For me, it was a "stepping stone." I had lived in a nice home, had a good job, worked hard and had a nice car. My kids had, up until that point, had a pretty easy life. I had EXPERIENCED first hand, what life could be. Sadly, others are not as fortunate.
As a child of God, I take it to heart when I read "From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked," (Luke 12:48) I am assured that everything I have was given to me from Christ. We must always remember that anything and everything we have, we did NOT acquire it on our own. I hear so many people say "Oh yes I did! Through hard work sweat and tears....I earned every single thing I have." I am not disputing that you worked hard....but as a christian, we are given gifts and talents. If you have a strong work ethic, GOD handed that down to you...maybe it was through your parents. Perhaps it was from another adult that took you under their wing....but YOU didn't get their on your own strength and merit alone.
Scripture also tells us that God loves a CHEERFUL giver. I love to give. I have no problem giving until it hurts. I was on the other side of having "plenty." It taught me to not only give, but to reach out to others that are less fortunate....and when we reach out brothers and sisters....reach out with your hearts. When we are really looking to help others...we will do it in a way that allows God's children, made in HIS image, to retain their dignity. We never should do anything for another human being for the sole purpose of shining among men...if you do that, you already have your reward.
Yes.....the sign in the picture "Don't spread my wealth...spread my work ethic" touched a very sensitive spot in me. Maybe this man will be moved by Almighty God and say to himself...."I am not going to wait for someone else to teach my work ethic...I am going to go out there and look for ways to encourage, build up and help someone that is less fortunate. I will teach them what it means to have a strong work ethic."
“Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.” That is a beautiful Chinese proverb I have read many times over the years. It is very true. If I were to make my own sign and hold it up for the world to see, I think it would say this....wish I could take credit for these words, but the God I serve said it:
"The KING will reply, I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for ME!"
Well, it didn't happen that way and I made the mistake of making a comment on a post and it caused what I considered an all out "free for all." So, I stepped away and have been very careful since then.
However, I find myself in a territory again that I don't enjoy visiting...but sometimes, it is a necessity. If I have learned one thing, I do not act or react based on MY own feelings. I do give the Holy Spirit full control though....a lesson that took many years to learn. Obedience to my God is way more important to me than how any human being feels or thinks about me. That being said, brings us to the here and now.
I was reading some posts on Facebook last night and as always, there are several thing posted that I just pass without even bothering to comment. (Holy Spirit at work again, let me tell ya!) But, then I come upon a picture that I see...and I continue to look at it and read the sign the man in the picture is holding. I struggle with what my soul is speaking to me.....but, I have also learned to "wait upon the Lord" because I have noticed when I shoot off at the mouth, I tend to make a mess of things. The sign the man was holding read:
"Don't spread my wealth...spread my work ethic."
I sat for several minutes after having read it and did a little inner battle with the Holy Spirit, because I just thought "God is on the throne....He can handle this." And then it just didn't go away.....that is how I always know that I am being prompted to write...and I never feel they are my words, but His!
Personally, I feel that this statement goes against EVERYTHING that I believe in. Before I get mauled to death....understand I am not saying for anyone to go out and give away everything that you have. I do get that people work very hard for their money. That said, we are not all given the same chances in life. There are people struggling with drug addiction. Do we know why? What is their story? Were they abused? Did they grow up in a home where drug use was an everyday occurrence? We have single parents living in public housing with children. Some are bettering themselves by attending college and working toward a goal, while others are trapped in the never ending cycle of poverty they were raised in. WHATEVER the reason someone is not as fortunate as me is a non issue as far as I am concerned.
You see, years ago, I was one of those women. I lived in public housing. I was on food stamps. I was on government insurance. I struggled to make ends meet. I had lost my job, my home, my car...everything. I was married at the time and my then husband had lost his job too. There were times that I took my little baby I had adopted and cleaned apartments that people had abandoned in housing, just to take money off of our rent for the month. For me, it was a "stepping stone." I had lived in a nice home, had a good job, worked hard and had a nice car. My kids had, up until that point, had a pretty easy life. I had EXPERIENCED first hand, what life could be. Sadly, others are not as fortunate.
As a child of God, I take it to heart when I read "From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked," (Luke 12:48) I am assured that everything I have was given to me from Christ. We must always remember that anything and everything we have, we did NOT acquire it on our own. I hear so many people say "Oh yes I did! Through hard work sweat and tears....I earned every single thing I have." I am not disputing that you worked hard....but as a christian, we are given gifts and talents. If you have a strong work ethic, GOD handed that down to you...maybe it was through your parents. Perhaps it was from another adult that took you under their wing....but YOU didn't get their on your own strength and merit alone.
Scripture also tells us that God loves a CHEERFUL giver. I love to give. I have no problem giving until it hurts. I was on the other side of having "plenty." It taught me to not only give, but to reach out to others that are less fortunate....and when we reach out brothers and sisters....reach out with your hearts. When we are really looking to help others...we will do it in a way that allows God's children, made in HIS image, to retain their dignity. We never should do anything for another human being for the sole purpose of shining among men...if you do that, you already have your reward.
Yes.....the sign in the picture "Don't spread my wealth...spread my work ethic" touched a very sensitive spot in me. Maybe this man will be moved by Almighty God and say to himself...."I am not going to wait for someone else to teach my work ethic...I am going to go out there and look for ways to encourage, build up and help someone that is less fortunate. I will teach them what it means to have a strong work ethic."
“Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.” That is a beautiful Chinese proverb I have read many times over the years. It is very true. If I were to make my own sign and hold it up for the world to see, I think it would say this....wish I could take credit for these words, but the God I serve said it:
"The KING will reply, I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for ME!"
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Let The Little Children Come
One of the complete and utter JOYS of my life began eight years ago when my first grandchild Layne Brianna came into this world. My daughter, at the time, was living in Germany and it was six LONG months before I got to lay eyes, not to mention hands and lips, on my beautiful little Laynie Bug, as she has become affectionately known in our family.
Since then, I have been tremendously blessed with eight more grandchildren and this coming June, I will be able to add yet another to make an even ten. I can honestly say that having grandchildren tops my list of "great happenings in this life." It makes every single teenage moment you go through with your own kids, every eye roll, every grounding....any and all things you just did not think you would possibly survive with your OWN kids....worth it.
There is finally that moment when you think..."They are just never going to grow up or they are never going to get where I am coming from....and then they go and do the unthinkable....they bless you with grandchildren.
My daughter Ryan and I often skype so that not only I can see MY baby face to face...but those beautiful grandchildren of mine. Several weeks ago, I had to have a couple of round places above my right eye shave biopsied and I will be the first to admit, I was very self conscious about it. I waited patiently (well, maybe not patiently...but, I did wait) for it to heal. I stayed in and didn't go out at all. Yeah, yeah..."Vanity thy name is woman." Got it!
At last...it did heal. The scabbing came off and I was left with a couple of round pink areas. At least I could now cover it with makeup! I was beginning to feel pretty good about it. My daughter had seen me without the bandages during this time of healing, and she was very encouraging. However, I never had the bandage off while skyping...just didn't want my grandchildren to see it.
Ryan and I were skyping and little 3 year Emma Kaye (she was given her middle name after her very proud Grammy!) was sitting beside her mommy and ever so often she would say something to me. I had on makeup and my hair was fixed (and not just in a pony tail.) I was feeling pretty good. And then Emma asked THE question. "Grammy, what are those things up on your eye?" My heart sank. I thought they were not so noticeable. I took a deep breath and explained to her what the small scars were and she smiled at me and then she said something that I will FOREVER remember because it melted this Grammy's heart....she said, "I wish I had two just like that Grammy."
Emma had a love so innocent and so pure and it ran so deep for her Grammy...it came from a place that we as adults, possibly never discover....that she wanted what I considered my "uglies" my "scars." It didn't look hideous to her. She loved me and wanted what Grammy had. At THAT very moment, I realized that THIS is the reason God says "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." Children come from such a place of pureness. They love so deep and so unconditionally. They wear their little hearts on their sleeves. They LOVE the same way God loves.
God doesn't just want all our good....He wants to take our scars and our "uglies" and heal and restore. The other day while skyping with my little 3 year old granddaughter, God used her in a very special way to touch my heart.....those few sweet words she said to me...."I wish I had two just like that Grammy," went a long way in my healing....and not just my surface scars.
Thank you Lord....Laynie, Kenny, Zoe, Emma, Collin, Riley, Christian, Ava, Zachy and in June our new little granddaughter Mykah.....Let the little children continue to come to me!
Since then, I have been tremendously blessed with eight more grandchildren and this coming June, I will be able to add yet another to make an even ten. I can honestly say that having grandchildren tops my list of "great happenings in this life." It makes every single teenage moment you go through with your own kids, every eye roll, every grounding....any and all things you just did not think you would possibly survive with your OWN kids....worth it.
There is finally that moment when you think..."They are just never going to grow up or they are never going to get where I am coming from....and then they go and do the unthinkable....they bless you with grandchildren.
My daughter Ryan and I often skype so that not only I can see MY baby face to face...but those beautiful grandchildren of mine. Several weeks ago, I had to have a couple of round places above my right eye shave biopsied and I will be the first to admit, I was very self conscious about it. I waited patiently (well, maybe not patiently...but, I did wait) for it to heal. I stayed in and didn't go out at all. Yeah, yeah..."Vanity thy name is woman." Got it!
At last...it did heal. The scabbing came off and I was left with a couple of round pink areas. At least I could now cover it with makeup! I was beginning to feel pretty good about it. My daughter had seen me without the bandages during this time of healing, and she was very encouraging. However, I never had the bandage off while skyping...just didn't want my grandchildren to see it.
Ryan and I were skyping and little 3 year Emma Kaye (she was given her middle name after her very proud Grammy!) was sitting beside her mommy and ever so often she would say something to me. I had on makeup and my hair was fixed (and not just in a pony tail.) I was feeling pretty good. And then Emma asked THE question. "Grammy, what are those things up on your eye?" My heart sank. I thought they were not so noticeable. I took a deep breath and explained to her what the small scars were and she smiled at me and then she said something that I will FOREVER remember because it melted this Grammy's heart....she said, "I wish I had two just like that Grammy."
Emma had a love so innocent and so pure and it ran so deep for her Grammy...it came from a place that we as adults, possibly never discover....that she wanted what I considered my "uglies" my "scars." It didn't look hideous to her. She loved me and wanted what Grammy had. At THAT very moment, I realized that THIS is the reason God says "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." Children come from such a place of pureness. They love so deep and so unconditionally. They wear their little hearts on their sleeves. They LOVE the same way God loves.
God doesn't just want all our good....He wants to take our scars and our "uglies" and heal and restore. The other day while skyping with my little 3 year old granddaughter, God used her in a very special way to touch my heart.....those few sweet words she said to me...."I wish I had two just like that Grammy," went a long way in my healing....and not just my surface scars.
Thank you Lord....Laynie, Kenny, Zoe, Emma, Collin, Riley, Christian, Ava, Zachy and in June our new little granddaughter Mykah.....Let the little children continue to come to me!
Thursday, January 24, 2013
God Is Trying To Tell Us Something!
Living in a small town can be an almost magical experience. I am blessed to live in the little town of Erin....Houston County, in Tennessee. We have a lot of "Irish Pride." Our Irish Festival is second to none. We have two traffic lights in our little town and they are a block apart. Everyone knows everyone. The little kids that are in elementary school now, have teachers that their parents grew up with. It is really idyllic.
Recently, our little town has suffered some mighty big tragedies. The first happened a little over a week ago. It will be a time I will forever remember, where I was, what I was doing. I just happened to be on facebook and see a new post "Prayers. Prayers. Prayers. I hope that there will be counselors for our babies." Immediately my heart sank. Had there been another school shooting? We had just lived the last month or more, glued to CNN, hanging on every word about the Sandy Hook school shootings. This couldn't possibly happen in our small little town, right? I contacted the poster and she told me what had happened.....the unthinkable....Mrs. Elaine Hewitt, principal of Erin Elementary School had been shot along with her husband and they believed that this had come at the hand of their son. Their home had also been burnt to the ground. Father God, I prayed.....why?
The next news came a few days later. The phone rang in our home and it was for Ken. As they talked I overheard Ken say "I thought I had heard sirens earlier." After hanging up, he mentioned that there had been a wreck on Main Street. Then, yet again, another posting on Facebook....."More prayers." After receiving many more phone calls, we learned that someone well known in the community, Dr. Donnie Lewis had driven out from the bank and drove under a propane truck and died. Later that evening, he was on the news. His son cried as he remembered and shared things that made his father such a special man. More sadness. A loved one gone too soon. "Jesus, Lord of mine....I do not understand," I prayed.
Then I get a text a few days later and there had been a fire in the cafeteria at Erin High School....they would be sending the kids home early. My friend went on to tell me, "God is trying to tell us something. Houston County better wake up!" After thinking on this a while.....I decided my friend is EXACTLY right! I do indeed believe He is trying to get our attention....but maybe in a bit of a different way than my friend was thinking.
Here is my theory.....I believe that we have a loving God. I believe that He was trying to tell us:
1." It is a heartbreaking loss for this community....a school has lost their beloved principal. Two daughters have lost both of their parents and brother in one day. The house that held so many mementos...all gone! Bad weather came overnight.....there was no school for all of Houston County that day! Your little town did not endure another Sandy Hook. I watched on as all of your community gathered at the high school and crossed denominational lines and sang to Me and prayed to Me! I am still on the Throne. I do not sleep! Every child in Houston County that attends Erin Elementary will be tucked in and kissed by their parents....I'm still a very present help in times of trouble!"
2." Dr. Donnie Lewis possibly had a heart attack or some other health illness that caused him to wreck...driving under a propane truck. Had that truck exploded...it could have taken out an entire neighborhood. Your little town could have lost the bank, the funeral home, the shops, the homes in that immediate area. Dr. Lewis could have had one or more of his precious grandchildren or other family members or friends in the car with him. That didn't happen. He will be mourned and greatly missed....but, he is with Me now! Every person that was in that area, at that moment, walked away without a scratch. You all will be welcome to worship in any of the Houses of the Lord, that remain standing because the propane truck did not explode."
3. "Yes, there was a small fire at the high school in the kitchen and the sprinklers came on and ruined the lunch. Not one cafeteria worker was harmed. Every student walked out of that school alive. No burns. The ONLY thing that they left without that day was....a belly filled with school lunch."
So, it is very clear to me that God IS trying to get our attention. He is letting us know that He never promised us sunshine and rainbows for the rest of our lives. I cause My sun to rise on the evil and the good, and I send rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. What seems the loudest and the clearest to me is God is trying to make us HEAR....."I am here! You will never be forsaken! I have sent a Comforter for times such as these. Let Me be your refuge, your strength!"
Keep speaking Lord.....I will keep listening!
Recently, our little town has suffered some mighty big tragedies. The first happened a little over a week ago. It will be a time I will forever remember, where I was, what I was doing. I just happened to be on facebook and see a new post "Prayers. Prayers. Prayers. I hope that there will be counselors for our babies." Immediately my heart sank. Had there been another school shooting? We had just lived the last month or more, glued to CNN, hanging on every word about the Sandy Hook school shootings. This couldn't possibly happen in our small little town, right? I contacted the poster and she told me what had happened.....the unthinkable....Mrs. Elaine Hewitt, principal of Erin Elementary School had been shot along with her husband and they believed that this had come at the hand of their son. Their home had also been burnt to the ground. Father God, I prayed.....why?
The next news came a few days later. The phone rang in our home and it was for Ken. As they talked I overheard Ken say "I thought I had heard sirens earlier." After hanging up, he mentioned that there had been a wreck on Main Street. Then, yet again, another posting on Facebook....."More prayers." After receiving many more phone calls, we learned that someone well known in the community, Dr. Donnie Lewis had driven out from the bank and drove under a propane truck and died. Later that evening, he was on the news. His son cried as he remembered and shared things that made his father such a special man. More sadness. A loved one gone too soon. "Jesus, Lord of mine....I do not understand," I prayed.
Then I get a text a few days later and there had been a fire in the cafeteria at Erin High School....they would be sending the kids home early. My friend went on to tell me, "God is trying to tell us something. Houston County better wake up!" After thinking on this a while.....I decided my friend is EXACTLY right! I do indeed believe He is trying to get our attention....but maybe in a bit of a different way than my friend was thinking.
Here is my theory.....I believe that we have a loving God. I believe that He was trying to tell us:
1." It is a heartbreaking loss for this community....a school has lost their beloved principal. Two daughters have lost both of their parents and brother in one day. The house that held so many mementos...all gone! Bad weather came overnight.....there was no school for all of Houston County that day! Your little town did not endure another Sandy Hook. I watched on as all of your community gathered at the high school and crossed denominational lines and sang to Me and prayed to Me! I am still on the Throne. I do not sleep! Every child in Houston County that attends Erin Elementary will be tucked in and kissed by their parents....I'm still a very present help in times of trouble!"
2." Dr. Donnie Lewis possibly had a heart attack or some other health illness that caused him to wreck...driving under a propane truck. Had that truck exploded...it could have taken out an entire neighborhood. Your little town could have lost the bank, the funeral home, the shops, the homes in that immediate area. Dr. Lewis could have had one or more of his precious grandchildren or other family members or friends in the car with him. That didn't happen. He will be mourned and greatly missed....but, he is with Me now! Every person that was in that area, at that moment, walked away without a scratch. You all will be welcome to worship in any of the Houses of the Lord, that remain standing because the propane truck did not explode."
3. "Yes, there was a small fire at the high school in the kitchen and the sprinklers came on and ruined the lunch. Not one cafeteria worker was harmed. Every student walked out of that school alive. No burns. The ONLY thing that they left without that day was....a belly filled with school lunch."
So, it is very clear to me that God IS trying to get our attention. He is letting us know that He never promised us sunshine and rainbows for the rest of our lives. I cause My sun to rise on the evil and the good, and I send rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. What seems the loudest and the clearest to me is God is trying to make us HEAR....."I am here! You will never be forsaken! I have sent a Comforter for times such as these. Let Me be your refuge, your strength!"
Keep speaking Lord.....I will keep listening!
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Going to the Source
I can remember so many teachings that my parents handed down to myself and my siblings over the years.....but, one keeps playing itself on the screen of my mind over and over today!
"Julia Kaye, there will ALWAYS be people out there that would love nothing better than to mess with your mind, cause much unneeded turmoil.....but you have to take them with a grain of salt. In one ear and out the other!"
If I have heard it once, I heard it thousands of times It makes total sense....until that annoying little fly begins buzzing around your head and just will not go away. If a person has any sense, they go in search of one heck of a big fly swatter.
The last couple of days have been such days for me. I have been looking for soothing. I have been trying to find that ONE that will stand up for me and tell a person off, preventing future confrontations. Yet again, (hanging my head right now) I admit freely.....I have looked in all the wrong places! While I do indeed feel wounded and a bit battered....I am NOT out for the count.
I picked up my "band aid" (Scripture) today and applied it....and it must have some antibiotic (sooting balm) with it also, because the "hopelessness" is lifting. God's Word never returns VOID. I read it. I study it. I apply it.
As I listened to Mercy Me's new song "The Hurt and the Healer Collide" I could feel the Healer working.....
"Julia Kaye, there will ALWAYS be people out there that would love nothing better than to mess with your mind, cause much unneeded turmoil.....but you have to take them with a grain of salt. In one ear and out the other!"
If I have heard it once, I heard it thousands of times It makes total sense....until that annoying little fly begins buzzing around your head and just will not go away. If a person has any sense, they go in search of one heck of a big fly swatter.
The last couple of days have been such days for me. I have been looking for soothing. I have been trying to find that ONE that will stand up for me and tell a person off, preventing future confrontations. Yet again, (hanging my head right now) I admit freely.....I have looked in all the wrong places! While I do indeed feel wounded and a bit battered....I am NOT out for the count.
I picked up my "band aid" (Scripture) today and applied it....and it must have some antibiotic (sooting balm) with it also, because the "hopelessness" is lifting. God's Word never returns VOID. I read it. I study it. I apply it.
As I listened to Mercy Me's new song "The Hurt and the Healer Collide" I could feel the Healer working.....
Why?
The question that is never far away
The healing doesn't come from being explained
Jesus please don't let this go in vain
You're all I have
All that remains
So here I am
What's left of me
Where glory meets my suffering
I'm alive
Even though a part of me has died
You take my heart and breathe it back to life
I fall into Your arms open wide
When the hurt and the healer collide
Breathe
Sometimes I feel it's all that I can do
Pain so deep that I can hardly move
Just keep my eyes completely fixed on You
Lord take hold and pull me through
So here I am
What's left of me
Where glory meets my suffering
I'm alive
Even though a part of me has died
You take my heart and breathe it back to life
I fall into your arms open wide
When the hurt and the healer collide
It's the moment when humanity
Is overcome by majesty
When grace is ushered in for good
And all our scars are understood
When mercy takes it's rightful place
And all these questions fade away
When out of the weakness we must bow
And hear You say "It's over now"
I'm alive
Even though a part of me has died
You take this heart and breathe it back to life
I fall into your arms open wide
The question that is never far away
The healing doesn't come from being explained
Jesus please don't let this go in vain
You're all I have
All that remains
So here I am
What's left of me
Where glory meets my suffering
I'm alive
Even though a part of me has died
You take my heart and breathe it back to life
I fall into Your arms open wide
When the hurt and the healer collide
Breathe
Sometimes I feel it's all that I can do
Pain so deep that I can hardly move
Just keep my eyes completely fixed on You
Lord take hold and pull me through
So here I am
What's left of me
Where glory meets my suffering
I'm alive
Even though a part of me has died
You take my heart and breathe it back to life
I fall into your arms open wide
When the hurt and the healer collide
It's the moment when humanity
Is overcome by majesty
When grace is ushered in for good
And all our scars are understood
When mercy takes it's rightful place
And all these questions fade away
When out of the weakness we must bow
And hear You say "It's over now"
I'm alive
Even though a part of me has died
You take this heart and breathe it back to life
I fall into your arms open wide
We all have our days, our weeks, our moments. Some days it is something as simple as a snide remark from a person that delights in hurting another human being. Whatever it is, whomever it is......it is always gotten "through" by the grace of God.
Scripture that comforted me today"
"To you, O Lord, I lift up my soul; in you I trust. O my God, Do not let me be put to shame, nor let my enemies triumph over me. No one whose hope is in you will ever be put to shame, but they will be put to shame who are treacherous without excuse." Psalm 25:1-3
I do not pretend to be a Bible scholar....but what this says to me is simply this....."I got you Julia. You are my baby girl!" Going to thank God for that and sit back and let Daddy handle it all!
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Just Keeping It Real
Can I just say that there are days that I would LOVE to be known as anything or anyone other than A Pastor's Wife? Please do me a HUGE favor, and reread that first line. I did NOT say that I hate being a Pastor's Wife. I did NOT say I wish I was married to anyone other than a pastor. I merely stated that there were times, I wouldn't mind being known as someone a little more exciting than "The Pastor's Wife."
I can hear the gasps as you read this....."Ohhhh no, she is another bored housewife!" or "Something is going on that we do not know, she doesn't like being a pastor's wife." Nothing could be farther from the truth.
This morning began as any other. I got up...had a cup of coffee, read my Bible and prayed. I kissed the air in the general direction of my husband. I awoke a sleepy nine year old, that had NO desire whatsoever to be awakened. When it was time for school to begin....she started developing symptoms that ONLY arise a few minutes before or immediately following the beginning of school. During all of this, my husband, the Pastor, was preparing HIMSELF for the day that lay ahead of him
He would be attending his weekly Rotary Club meeting, where he is President. He would be eating lunch and having interesting conversation with many. He would sit quietly and enjoy whatever program the Rotary Club had planned for today. He comes home, gets to work on another project for another committee, club or organization he is a part of.....while, I struggle with the duties that happen to befall me.
While he has showered, gotten dressed and is looking great....I am still wearing last night's pony tail, no makeup and the most I have accomplished in the way of hygiene is....gargled with mouth wash and brushed my teeth. After all, I am going to be home, homeschooling a reluctant learner and fielding phone calls from those that wish to speak with the Pastor. I realize it doesn't sound like tough gig, but at times, it lacks a sort of luster.
I read all of the different posts my friends put on facebook....had a massage, joining my birthday boy for lunch, had a new grandchild and a ton of other things....sometimes feels that they are out living life. I have women that I admire that are out running bookstores, teaching, going to Bible studies, visiting other countries, away at writing seminars....I could go on and on, but seriously, it would not help the mood I find myself in.
I think the reason I find myself in such a funk today was after ten minutes of ocean study with my daughter, the excitement went away...the thrill was gone. I got a phone call and the person on the other end said "Oh you are JUST the pastor's wife....well, where can I reach him?"
Today I, like so many others I am reminding myself that I am more than a Pastor's Wife. I am more than a mommy or a grandmother. I am more than the woman that is growing more impatient by the day for all of the "boo boos" to heal and have my "real self" to return. I am someone who was born in the image of God....who was given talents and gifts to be exercised.
I guess after all, I am just me. I am not always the happy, bubbly person most folks expect a pastor's wife to be (that is what I always use to think!). I have the days where I grapple to give myself a definition, searching for something to define me other than being "his wife" or "Nevaeh's mom." Today.....I am a homeschooling mom married to a pastor that is feeling a little alone. It really is ok, folks! I am allowed to have days like that.
Join me as I pray for ALL pastor wives. Pastors tend to get a lot of pats on the back. They are seen on a much more regular basis than their wives. "Keeping the home fires burning" is not always the easiest of jobs....but, we do it. I will continue doing it. I admire all of the balls that my husband juggles on a daily basis. I think that the major difference between a pastor and his wife is the fac that he juggles in front of a lot of people.....a pastor's wife, juggles behind closed doors!
Tomorrow....my optimism and bubbly personality will return. But for today....I am just keeping it real!
I can hear the gasps as you read this....."Ohhhh no, she is another bored housewife!" or "Something is going on that we do not know, she doesn't like being a pastor's wife." Nothing could be farther from the truth.
This morning began as any other. I got up...had a cup of coffee, read my Bible and prayed. I kissed the air in the general direction of my husband. I awoke a sleepy nine year old, that had NO desire whatsoever to be awakened. When it was time for school to begin....she started developing symptoms that ONLY arise a few minutes before or immediately following the beginning of school. During all of this, my husband, the Pastor, was preparing HIMSELF for the day that lay ahead of him
He would be attending his weekly Rotary Club meeting, where he is President. He would be eating lunch and having interesting conversation with many. He would sit quietly and enjoy whatever program the Rotary Club had planned for today. He comes home, gets to work on another project for another committee, club or organization he is a part of.....while, I struggle with the duties that happen to befall me.
While he has showered, gotten dressed and is looking great....I am still wearing last night's pony tail, no makeup and the most I have accomplished in the way of hygiene is....gargled with mouth wash and brushed my teeth. After all, I am going to be home, homeschooling a reluctant learner and fielding phone calls from those that wish to speak with the Pastor. I realize it doesn't sound like tough gig, but at times, it lacks a sort of luster.
I read all of the different posts my friends put on facebook....had a massage, joining my birthday boy for lunch, had a new grandchild and a ton of other things....sometimes feels that they are out living life. I have women that I admire that are out running bookstores, teaching, going to Bible studies, visiting other countries, away at writing seminars....I could go on and on, but seriously, it would not help the mood I find myself in.
I think the reason I find myself in such a funk today was after ten minutes of ocean study with my daughter, the excitement went away...the thrill was gone. I got a phone call and the person on the other end said "Oh you are JUST the pastor's wife....well, where can I reach him?"
Today I, like so many others I am reminding myself that I am more than a Pastor's Wife. I am more than a mommy or a grandmother. I am more than the woman that is growing more impatient by the day for all of the "boo boos" to heal and have my "real self" to return. I am someone who was born in the image of God....who was given talents and gifts to be exercised.
I guess after all, I am just me. I am not always the happy, bubbly person most folks expect a pastor's wife to be (that is what I always use to think!). I have the days where I grapple to give myself a definition, searching for something to define me other than being "his wife" or "Nevaeh's mom." Today.....I am a homeschooling mom married to a pastor that is feeling a little alone. It really is ok, folks! I am allowed to have days like that.
Join me as I pray for ALL pastor wives. Pastors tend to get a lot of pats on the back. They are seen on a much more regular basis than their wives. "Keeping the home fires burning" is not always the easiest of jobs....but, we do it. I will continue doing it. I admire all of the balls that my husband juggles on a daily basis. I think that the major difference between a pastor and his wife is the fac that he juggles in front of a lot of people.....a pastor's wife, juggles behind closed doors!
Tomorrow....my optimism and bubbly personality will return. But for today....I am just keeping it real!
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