We all have embarrassing moments. Times when we wish we could just disappear or blend into the woodwork, right? Last night, I had one of those moments.
Most of you know that I am a Pastor's Wife. What some of you may not know, I am a NEW Pastor's Wife. My husband Ken is the Pastor of a Methodist Church. We have both been married before. While Ken has been blessed to have been a Pastor for 30+ years, I have only been at this new "job" for less than 2 years. The same year that we were married, Ken had been moved to our present church and while he took to it like a duck to water, it is a well known fact that I have struggled, like a non-swimmer thrown into the deep end of a pool without a life jacket. He can go into ANY situation full of confidence and know exactly what to do and not afraid in the least to speak up and make his presence known. I, on the other hand, tend to shy away from crowds and am more than happy to do anything to "further the kingdom" in the background without a lot of fuss or attention. So, while I am completely secure in being myself around my husband and family, it has taken some time to warm up to the people at church and get to know everyone and figure out what expectations they had of this Preacher's Wife. (Let me just add, they are amazing people and so accepting and loving!)
Last night, Ken and I had decided to take Nevaeh to Chuck E Cheese for a special night, as it her was her last night home before going for a month of Summer visitation with her Dad in Ohio. She wanted her little friend Erin to come along, who just happens to be a member of our church, as are her parents. Erin's mother and I are pretty good friends and she is definately someone that I am 100% comfortable at being myself with. We went to Chuck E Cheese and had a wonderful time and on our way home, I turned on the radio to listen to music. The girls were in the back seat and they were laughing and playing and seemed totally engrossed in what they were doing. It didn't take long for me to get into my own little zone and with my Pastor hubby beside me, I was getting into the beat of the song playing. Nothing horrible about that, right? Did I happen to mention that it was Lady Gaga? Did I also fail to mention that I was singing OUT LOUD no less, "...this beat is sick, I want to take a ride on your disco stick"?
That's right. The NEW Pastor's Wife (the same one that teaches the children's message each week) was singing at the top of her lungs and doing the seat belt mambo....and a little voice from the back seat says...."What is a disco stick?" and it was NOT my child! I turned and looked at my husband with horror and he smiled and asked, "Honey, did you forget that there are kids in the car?" Hmmmm.....how was I going to explain this to her dad when he arrived to pick her up? Just as I do everything else....just frankly and honestly! He was wonderful and her mother was even better.
The song that popped into my head immediately after that was a song that had been taught to me as a child. "Oh be careful little feet where you go. Oh be careful little hands what you do. Oh be careful little ears what you hear. Oh be careful little TONGUE what you say. For the Father up above is looking down in love...so....be careful little TONGUE what you say!"
I am more than sure that this applies to what we sing too!
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
If We Are The Body....WHY?
There is a christian song that I dearly love and each time that I listen to it, it just spurs me into action. The Casting Crowns came out with "If We Are The Body" a few years back that truly should resonate with christians everywhere.
This morning as I was reading a devotional. the scripture I read made me pause and for some reason that particular song came to mind.
"Therefore confess your sins to each other and PRAY FOR EACH OTHER so that you may be healed." (James 5:16) (The emphasis is MINE!)
I got to thinking....if we are the body of Christ, then we should feel pretty confident when we come to one another with hurts, or particularly stressful things going on in our individual lives. There should never be any judgement on either side. We should be more than ready to reach out to each other and offer our love and prayer and understanding. Sadly, we have all met those that claim to be part of the body of Christ yet when one of us falls or experiences trouble, they seem to rejoice in our sufferings. There is way too much time and emphasis put on what I call...."Non-Advancing-Of-The-Kingdom" issues! While it is necessary to halt everything and take a stand and fight for something that we believe in at times....it just feels like wasted time if it is not working toward the common goal of the body of Christ.
The lyrics of the song say it best....."If we are the body, why aren't HIS arms reaching? Why aren't HIS hands healing? Why aren't HIS words teaching? If we are the body, why aren't HIS feet going? Why is HIS Love not showing THEM there is a way? There is a WAY!!" If that song does not do something for you...something is wrong!
While there are a lot of articles out there written by christians, and I have read many lately....it is doing NO good whatsoever if your actions are not lined up with God's Word. I am not judging, I am speaking about myself also. I am blessed to be a part of the body of Christ and take it seriously. But, if we are to reach a lost world for the kingdom of Christ....then we must operate as ONE. ONE BODY....ONE MIND! That is rather impossible to achieve if the body of Christ is warring with each other. How does that look to the lost of this world?
Pray for each other.....I am praying for YOU! Please pray for me!
This morning as I was reading a devotional. the scripture I read made me pause and for some reason that particular song came to mind.
"Therefore confess your sins to each other and PRAY FOR EACH OTHER so that you may be healed." (James 5:16) (The emphasis is MINE!)
I got to thinking....if we are the body of Christ, then we should feel pretty confident when we come to one another with hurts, or particularly stressful things going on in our individual lives. There should never be any judgement on either side. We should be more than ready to reach out to each other and offer our love and prayer and understanding. Sadly, we have all met those that claim to be part of the body of Christ yet when one of us falls or experiences trouble, they seem to rejoice in our sufferings. There is way too much time and emphasis put on what I call...."Non-Advancing-Of-The-Kingdom" issues! While it is necessary to halt everything and take a stand and fight for something that we believe in at times....it just feels like wasted time if it is not working toward the common goal of the body of Christ.
The lyrics of the song say it best....."If we are the body, why aren't HIS arms reaching? Why aren't HIS hands healing? Why aren't HIS words teaching? If we are the body, why aren't HIS feet going? Why is HIS Love not showing THEM there is a way? There is a WAY!!" If that song does not do something for you...something is wrong!
While there are a lot of articles out there written by christians, and I have read many lately....it is doing NO good whatsoever if your actions are not lined up with God's Word. I am not judging, I am speaking about myself also. I am blessed to be a part of the body of Christ and take it seriously. But, if we are to reach a lost world for the kingdom of Christ....then we must operate as ONE. ONE BODY....ONE MIND! That is rather impossible to achieve if the body of Christ is warring with each other. How does that look to the lost of this world?
Pray for each other.....I am praying for YOU! Please pray for me!
Do You Know Where We Are?
"In all your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him, and He will direct and make straight and plain your paths." (Proverbs 3:6)
Sometimes we get some of our greatest life lessons by the most unlikely of teachers. Not too long ago, my husband and I had taken our five year old daughter, Nevaeh and had to make a trip out of town to visit a funeral home and to check on an elderly lady that was in the hospital. While we had very exact directions leading us to the funeral home, we weren't quite as fortunate in getting back on the path that led to the hospital.
Now, my husband being all things male, felt there was no need to stop and ask directions. We drove on for several minutes and he would comment ever so often, "Maybe if I turn left here and go straight..." and I just sat quietly, because even though we have only been married a little over a year...I did grow up in a home with a daddy and four brothers. So, to even hint at the dreaded "Don't you think that we should stop and ask directions?" would be a form of blasphemy! Just as I am growing increasingly frustrated, this little voice from the back seat asks her Papa....."Do you know where we are?" and Papa answered in the affirmative. Then the bombshell.......
"THEN WHY ARE WE LOST?" Wow! Ken and I both laughed, but I was already thinking of how I would write about this. I knew that there was a lesson of some sort in those five little innocent words.
In my life, there have been so many times that I thought that I knew where I was going, had a good grasp on it and was taking care of business. So, if I was so confident and thought that I was exactly where I was suppose to be, doing everything that I was suppose to be doing....why did I feel like I was struggling so hard? Could it be that I was trying to operate out of the flesh? I mean, I was serving God and I had a plan. I had pieced the plan together in my mind and decided ON MY OWN that this is what God wanted and THEN, I prayed about it. Little did I know that I had it all out of sequence. I was suppose to be ACKNOWLEDGING Him and then allowing HIM to direct my paths. That is what I love about the Amplified bible....it just lays it all out for you.
Now, I am at a stage in my life that I have grown and continue to mature in my spiritual walk and I am not so quick to jump into things. I get out of bed in the morning and I say to God immediately, "I am not going to do anything today that is not YOU. If YOU want me to do something, I am going to put all my trust and faith in YOU and know that YOU will direct my path. Thank YOU Father for the Holy Spirit.....it is all about YOU!"
When my sweet little girl uttered those five little words, she had no idea that God was using her as a teacher on that particular day. As I write this, I grow excited thinking of the day that she will read this and know that I heard God speak through her and I listened. In order to be obedient to God, we have to be quiet and listen. Thankfully on this day, I kept my mouth closed (yet another shout out to the Holy Spirit for telling me to be quiet) and my ears open and allowed myself to be taught....He will always direct your path!
Sometimes we get some of our greatest life lessons by the most unlikely of teachers. Not too long ago, my husband and I had taken our five year old daughter, Nevaeh and had to make a trip out of town to visit a funeral home and to check on an elderly lady that was in the hospital. While we had very exact directions leading us to the funeral home, we weren't quite as fortunate in getting back on the path that led to the hospital.
Now, my husband being all things male, felt there was no need to stop and ask directions. We drove on for several minutes and he would comment ever so often, "Maybe if I turn left here and go straight..." and I just sat quietly, because even though we have only been married a little over a year...I did grow up in a home with a daddy and four brothers. So, to even hint at the dreaded "Don't you think that we should stop and ask directions?" would be a form of blasphemy! Just as I am growing increasingly frustrated, this little voice from the back seat asks her Papa....."Do you know where we are?" and Papa answered in the affirmative. Then the bombshell.......
"THEN WHY ARE WE LOST?" Wow! Ken and I both laughed, but I was already thinking of how I would write about this. I knew that there was a lesson of some sort in those five little innocent words.
In my life, there have been so many times that I thought that I knew where I was going, had a good grasp on it and was taking care of business. So, if I was so confident and thought that I was exactly where I was suppose to be, doing everything that I was suppose to be doing....why did I feel like I was struggling so hard? Could it be that I was trying to operate out of the flesh? I mean, I was serving God and I had a plan. I had pieced the plan together in my mind and decided ON MY OWN that this is what God wanted and THEN, I prayed about it. Little did I know that I had it all out of sequence. I was suppose to be ACKNOWLEDGING Him and then allowing HIM to direct my paths. That is what I love about the Amplified bible....it just lays it all out for you.
Now, I am at a stage in my life that I have grown and continue to mature in my spiritual walk and I am not so quick to jump into things. I get out of bed in the morning and I say to God immediately, "I am not going to do anything today that is not YOU. If YOU want me to do something, I am going to put all my trust and faith in YOU and know that YOU will direct my path. Thank YOU Father for the Holy Spirit.....it is all about YOU!"
When my sweet little girl uttered those five little words, she had no idea that God was using her as a teacher on that particular day. As I write this, I grow excited thinking of the day that she will read this and know that I heard God speak through her and I listened. In order to be obedient to God, we have to be quiet and listen. Thankfully on this day, I kept my mouth closed (yet another shout out to the Holy Spirit for telling me to be quiet) and my ears open and allowed myself to be taught....He will always direct your path!
No Such Thing As Minor Victories!
It has been my goal of late, to discern when it is God that is speaking to me. I am seeking to hear and know HIS voice and trying to make better choices. Most of all, I want to know that I am hearing HIM and obeying.
Today, I needed to go into town and shop for gifts that our Sunday school class will be giving to a group of people that we will be having a party for on Monday. The gifts needed to be wrapped and ready at church on Sunday. I had volunteered to do the shopping last week and then Monday hit and it has been a crazy whirlwind all week. So, this morning, I set out alone (thought I'd get finished faster if the little five year old was home) and pointed the car in the direction of Clarksville. There was a little voice that kept saying "Go to the WalMart in Waverly." I have been there before, but usually ventured into Clarksville because that is where my family is and I could stop and visit after I finish errands.
Trying to be obedient, I decided to listen to the voice and headed towards Waverly. As I drove, I had a very pleasant and uninterrupted conversation with God. There were so many things laid on my heart...old grudges that I had been holding onto, unforgiveness of others and even some anger issues that if not let go of, could turn me into a not so nice person. I noticed all of the nature on the way and just felt so in tuned with God.
I went to the WalMart, got everything that I needed and left, ready to make the trip back home. However, the ever small voice told me to take a trip on up the road and I did. I stopped at a yard sale and bought nothing, but did ask the man if there was a McDonald's in Waverly and he gave me some directions. I have never been very comfortable driving around in places that I haven't been before. I followed the directions and was pleased to find not only a McDonald's, but a Sonic, Kentucky Fried Chicken and a Chinese restaurant. I grew very excited. While I am sure that we all would agree, these are not fancy places to eat or anything, I felt that this was a minor victory for me. I was thrilled. I found that I was not in the least afraid to explore. I did not feel alone.
I didn't really understand why I was feeling so euphoric as I drove home. I had just gone out and ran a few errands like I had countless other times, but today felt different. The closer I got to home, I began to realize that God had spoken to my heart and I had listened. God had asked a very little thing of me....to go to Waverly instead of Clarksville. The scripture that came to mind was..."He who is faithful in a very little [thing] is faithful also in much.." (Luke 16:10) Each time I conquer a little thing that God gives me, I become more empowered and I garner this strength that readies me for the next thing that God has in store.
There is NO such thing as a minor victory in God's eyes. Every small act of obedience is great in HIS eyes! It has taken me a long time to just be still and listen for God's voice and even longer to take heed, but at last, I am getting there. He's been speaking to me all along, I was just not prepared to HEAR. To many, this may be just a short drive that I took today to one place instead of another, but God and I know, that there was nothing minor about today.
"Let be and be still, and know (recognize and understand) that I am God" (Psalm 46:10)
Today, I needed to go into town and shop for gifts that our Sunday school class will be giving to a group of people that we will be having a party for on Monday. The gifts needed to be wrapped and ready at church on Sunday. I had volunteered to do the shopping last week and then Monday hit and it has been a crazy whirlwind all week. So, this morning, I set out alone (thought I'd get finished faster if the little five year old was home) and pointed the car in the direction of Clarksville. There was a little voice that kept saying "Go to the WalMart in Waverly." I have been there before, but usually ventured into Clarksville because that is where my family is and I could stop and visit after I finish errands.
Trying to be obedient, I decided to listen to the voice and headed towards Waverly. As I drove, I had a very pleasant and uninterrupted conversation with God. There were so many things laid on my heart...old grudges that I had been holding onto, unforgiveness of others and even some anger issues that if not let go of, could turn me into a not so nice person. I noticed all of the nature on the way and just felt so in tuned with God.
I went to the WalMart, got everything that I needed and left, ready to make the trip back home. However, the ever small voice told me to take a trip on up the road and I did. I stopped at a yard sale and bought nothing, but did ask the man if there was a McDonald's in Waverly and he gave me some directions. I have never been very comfortable driving around in places that I haven't been before. I followed the directions and was pleased to find not only a McDonald's, but a Sonic, Kentucky Fried Chicken and a Chinese restaurant. I grew very excited. While I am sure that we all would agree, these are not fancy places to eat or anything, I felt that this was a minor victory for me. I was thrilled. I found that I was not in the least afraid to explore. I did not feel alone.
I didn't really understand why I was feeling so euphoric as I drove home. I had just gone out and ran a few errands like I had countless other times, but today felt different. The closer I got to home, I began to realize that God had spoken to my heart and I had listened. God had asked a very little thing of me....to go to Waverly instead of Clarksville. The scripture that came to mind was..."He who is faithful in a very little [thing] is faithful also in much.." (Luke 16:10) Each time I conquer a little thing that God gives me, I become more empowered and I garner this strength that readies me for the next thing that God has in store.
There is NO such thing as a minor victory in God's eyes. Every small act of obedience is great in HIS eyes! It has taken me a long time to just be still and listen for God's voice and even longer to take heed, but at last, I am getting there. He's been speaking to me all along, I was just not prepared to HEAR. To many, this may be just a short drive that I took today to one place instead of another, but God and I know, that there was nothing minor about today.
"Let be and be still, and know (recognize and understand) that I am God" (Psalm 46:10)
Jealousy...An UGLY Emotion!
While recently going about every day life, I have encountered jealousy and the rearing of its ugly head aimed at myself, forcing me to pause and take a long look at this most awful of emotions! I have always known the meaning of the word jealousy, but wanted to get Old Webster's perspective on it.
Jealous: adj 1:demanding complete devotion 2: suspicious of a rival or of one believed to enjoy an advantage 3: VIGILANT
Hmmm, while I have always loved the word vigilant and even considered myself to be this or at least strive to be ever vigilant....I wanted to yet again turn to my friend, Webster.
Vigilant: adj alertly watchful esp. to avoid danger. I like that definition and think that is precisely what the Bible speaks of when it talks of us being ever vigilant.
One of my all time favorite stories from the Bible as a little girl was about Joseph and the coat of many colors. As I got older, I realized that there was much more to the story than just a kid scoring a cool coat. Out of all the stories told in the Bible, this one best represents what the bitterness of jealousy can do to the mind and heart of a person. Joseph obviously held a special place in the heart of his father. I am sure that Jacob loved all of his other children, but his heart held a fondness for Joseph because he was born to him in his old age. Once his brothers saw that their father loved Joseph so much, they grew bitter with their hatred and the Bible tells us, could not even speak a kind word to their own brother. How sad.
As they allowed the jealousy to take root and grow in their hearts, they got together and hatched a plan. They intended to kill their little brother. Just throw him away like yesterday's garbage and it would be good riddance to him. One brother, showed a little character and stepped forward and told them to just throw him in a well, and planned to rescue him at a later time. But, would he have done that? How was he to know that there wasn't a poisonous snake in the bottom of the cistern that would bite and kill him? However, after throwing their brother into the well, they decided it was all for naught. They schemed yet again. Merely throwing their much despised brother into a well wasn't bad enough, why not sell him to passing merchants and allow them to use him as a slave if they so wished. After being handed twenty shekels of silver, the deed was done.
What the brothers did not bank on was the mind numbing grief of their father. No matter what any of them tried to do, they could find no way to console him. Did the sons feel any guilt as to the pain they were causing their father? Or did jealousy numb them to anyone else's pain? After they had ridded themselves of their brother, did the jealousy and bitterness leave their hearts? I am going to go out on a limb and answer a resounding NO!
Even after all that was done to Joseph, many years later, after enduring many painful times in his life, which God turned around to His favor...Joseph was once again reunited with his brothers. Hence one of the most beautiful passages in the Bible, to me....."You intended to harm me, but GOD intended it for good." (Genesis 50:20)
I struggled with jealousy for a period in my life. It is not a pretty emotion to display or to feel. It is a soul eating bacteria that once it has one in its clutches, I truly believe, only GOD can rid a person of it. I prayed often for God to take it from me and the way in which HE healed me, was to allow me to see it up close and personal through another. While it is hard to catch a mere glimpse of yourself through someone else, it can be humbling. Proverbs 14:30 says it best, "A heart at peace gives life to the body, but ENVY rots the bones."
While there are those that feel that we are accountable to each other as christians, I do not think that we are to feel jealousy towards one another therefore, ignore the plank in your own eye and point out the speck in your brother's. If you experience jealousy at some point, dig it up from the roots and rid yourself of it before it has a chance to grow. Once it takes root, I think that ONLY God can rid your very soul of it.
Jealousy makes the prettiest of people quite ugly. All other redeeming qualites that the person may possess are no longer visible. I have now seen it close up and aimed at me and that alone, thank you God, will keep me ever VIGILANT to steer clear of the danger of jealousy.
Jealous: adj 1:demanding complete devotion 2: suspicious of a rival or of one believed to enjoy an advantage 3: VIGILANT
Hmmm, while I have always loved the word vigilant and even considered myself to be this or at least strive to be ever vigilant....I wanted to yet again turn to my friend, Webster.
Vigilant: adj alertly watchful esp. to avoid danger. I like that definition and think that is precisely what the Bible speaks of when it talks of us being ever vigilant.
One of my all time favorite stories from the Bible as a little girl was about Joseph and the coat of many colors. As I got older, I realized that there was much more to the story than just a kid scoring a cool coat. Out of all the stories told in the Bible, this one best represents what the bitterness of jealousy can do to the mind and heart of a person. Joseph obviously held a special place in the heart of his father. I am sure that Jacob loved all of his other children, but his heart held a fondness for Joseph because he was born to him in his old age. Once his brothers saw that their father loved Joseph so much, they grew bitter with their hatred and the Bible tells us, could not even speak a kind word to their own brother. How sad.
As they allowed the jealousy to take root and grow in their hearts, they got together and hatched a plan. They intended to kill their little brother. Just throw him away like yesterday's garbage and it would be good riddance to him. One brother, showed a little character and stepped forward and told them to just throw him in a well, and planned to rescue him at a later time. But, would he have done that? How was he to know that there wasn't a poisonous snake in the bottom of the cistern that would bite and kill him? However, after throwing their brother into the well, they decided it was all for naught. They schemed yet again. Merely throwing their much despised brother into a well wasn't bad enough, why not sell him to passing merchants and allow them to use him as a slave if they so wished. After being handed twenty shekels of silver, the deed was done.
What the brothers did not bank on was the mind numbing grief of their father. No matter what any of them tried to do, they could find no way to console him. Did the sons feel any guilt as to the pain they were causing their father? Or did jealousy numb them to anyone else's pain? After they had ridded themselves of their brother, did the jealousy and bitterness leave their hearts? I am going to go out on a limb and answer a resounding NO!
Even after all that was done to Joseph, many years later, after enduring many painful times in his life, which God turned around to His favor...Joseph was once again reunited with his brothers. Hence one of the most beautiful passages in the Bible, to me....."You intended to harm me, but GOD intended it for good." (Genesis 50:20)
I struggled with jealousy for a period in my life. It is not a pretty emotion to display or to feel. It is a soul eating bacteria that once it has one in its clutches, I truly believe, only GOD can rid a person of it. I prayed often for God to take it from me and the way in which HE healed me, was to allow me to see it up close and personal through another. While it is hard to catch a mere glimpse of yourself through someone else, it can be humbling. Proverbs 14:30 says it best, "A heart at peace gives life to the body, but ENVY rots the bones."
While there are those that feel that we are accountable to each other as christians, I do not think that we are to feel jealousy towards one another therefore, ignore the plank in your own eye and point out the speck in your brother's. If you experience jealousy at some point, dig it up from the roots and rid yourself of it before it has a chance to grow. Once it takes root, I think that ONLY God can rid your very soul of it.
Jealousy makes the prettiest of people quite ugly. All other redeeming qualites that the person may possess are no longer visible. I have now seen it close up and aimed at me and that alone, thank you God, will keep me ever VIGILANT to steer clear of the danger of jealousy.
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
God Never Forgets
Lately, I have been struggling with impatience and an attitude of "I want what I want and I want it right now!" I have gotten discouraged at times and found myself praying to God, "Look, I've been trying really hard to do all that YOU want me to do and have tried to be what YOU expect of me." The mere fact that I was REMINDING God, (of all people) that I was being a good girl and would HE please stop what He was doing and take notice at once....speaks volumes of my total lack of understanding. I read His Word every day and I pray for knowledge and wisdom. There are mornings that I will finish my devotions and set my Bible down and have that wonderful feeling inside and am totally prepared to start my day.
Then, there are, undoubtedly, the other days. We all face them. We read our Bibles and think, "Gosh, none of that even applied to me!"
This has been a tough few months for myself and my family. We have been struggling with things that for the majority of the time, we know and feel 100% that our God is in control. Then, there are times that I allow Satan to edge his creepy way in and place doubts and fears and it just tends to throw me off balance.
Tonight, as I was reading through my Bible, once again, looking for something to jump out and speak to me....I got to Hebrews. It all became clear once again. At the beginning of all the present problems, my husband and I promised each other, but most importantly, Our Father, that no matter what, we continue to serve and pray and thank God daily for His goodness. We have leaned on all of the promises that HE gives us in His never changing Word. Yet again, I was reminded that even in my times of weakness and doubt...."For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are...yet was without sin." (Hebrews 4:15) WOW! When I wanted to give up or let someone else "drink from my cup" I wasn't alone.....He understood.
All of the days that I have had that MOMENTARY pause and felt, "What's it all for?" and then to read, "God is not unjust; He will not forget your work and the love you have shown Him as you have helped His people and continue to help them." (Hebrews 6:10) Even when I forget what He has promised to do, HE hasn't! He keeps all of HIS promises. Just as assuredly as He remembers the good and how I have tried to continue to march through the bad times, I am sure that HE is going to remember the times that I got angry or lost a little trust or "threw-a-not-so-cute-for-a-44 year old-woman- tantrum"...and the next time I start to feel this, will gently remind me how it did not work for me the last time.
God keeps His promises. He NEVER forgets what HE promises......"We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure." (Hebrews 6:19)
Praying that we all realize that Our Father's memory is not as remiss as ours!
Then, there are, undoubtedly, the other days. We all face them. We read our Bibles and think, "Gosh, none of that even applied to me!"
This has been a tough few months for myself and my family. We have been struggling with things that for the majority of the time, we know and feel 100% that our God is in control. Then, there are times that I allow Satan to edge his creepy way in and place doubts and fears and it just tends to throw me off balance.
Tonight, as I was reading through my Bible, once again, looking for something to jump out and speak to me....I got to Hebrews. It all became clear once again. At the beginning of all the present problems, my husband and I promised each other, but most importantly, Our Father, that no matter what, we continue to serve and pray and thank God daily for His goodness. We have leaned on all of the promises that HE gives us in His never changing Word. Yet again, I was reminded that even in my times of weakness and doubt...."For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are...yet was without sin." (Hebrews 4:15) WOW! When I wanted to give up or let someone else "drink from my cup" I wasn't alone.....He understood.
All of the days that I have had that MOMENTARY pause and felt, "What's it all for?" and then to read, "God is not unjust; He will not forget your work and the love you have shown Him as you have helped His people and continue to help them." (Hebrews 6:10) Even when I forget what He has promised to do, HE hasn't! He keeps all of HIS promises. Just as assuredly as He remembers the good and how I have tried to continue to march through the bad times, I am sure that HE is going to remember the times that I got angry or lost a little trust or "threw-a-not-so-cute-for-a-44 year old-woman- tantrum"...and the next time I start to feel this, will gently remind me how it did not work for me the last time.
God keeps His promises. He NEVER forgets what HE promises......"We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure." (Hebrews 6:19)
Praying that we all realize that Our Father's memory is not as remiss as ours!
Silent Prayer
I was told by a very special woman that I hold in the highest regard, that she sat through a sermon once and the preacher actually said that "silent prayers go no where." Well, just to be fair, she is a little older and she thought that perhaps she had heard him wrong, but was quite upset by the remark as she was oft times a very private and silent prayer. When she returned from church, she contacted her attorney son and asked him what she had heard and he could tell that his mother was quite distressed. He assured his mother that this was not true and though it relieved her some, she did leave the church.
As I was reading my bible last night, I came across the story of Hannah. She was married to a man, Elkanah and she was one of his two wives. The other wife had bore him children, but, alas, Hannah had not. In this story, it seems that Elkanah had a deep love for Hannah and she prayed constantly for a child even promising her God that she would gladly turn her son over to Him all the days of her young son's life, if God would just bless her with a child.
Hannah was in the temple praying one day and Eli, the priest noticed that here was this woman and he could see her lips moving but NO SOUND was coming from them. 1 Samuel 1:13 tells us that "Hannah was praying in her heart, and her lips were moving but her voice was not heard." Eli thought that perhaps she was drunk. She had to tell the priest that she was praying!
How many times have you been driving in the rain and silently prayed that God would get you through all the traffic, accident free? I have numerous times. When your child has just dangled on your last nerve, how many times have you silently prayed to God to help you maintain a semblence of control? My hand is raised again! I can quote you hundreds of times that my own mother has silently prayed over things and gotten answers from God.
If we go back to the story of Hannah, early in the chapter it tells us that God had closed her womb. Later, as she lay with her husband, it also tells us that "..the Lord remembered her." (vs. 19) Now, if silent prayer goes no where....HOW did God remember her prayer and what she had asked for? Did Hannah indeed get pregnant and give birth to a son? Yes, she did! If God closed her womb, isn't it only reasonable for we christians to believe that HE was the one that reopened it! Hannah was quick to give the Lord the glory..."I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of Him." (1 Samuel 1:27)
I am and have always been a person that prayer is a very personal thing. I enjoy praying and think that I have a good prayer relationship with my Father. I am not always eloquent in speech and have felt uncomfortable praying out loud in front of a large group of people. "But when you, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you." (Matthew 6:6) It stands to reason that if my omnipotent God "sees" all that is done in secret, then He most assureedly HEARS what is said in silence. I will go so far as to challenge this particular pastor.....If you or any other christian is THINKING an impure thought and you do not VERBALIZE it....does God hear that? I somehow do not believe that He is just going to let it slide if it is thought or said in silence.
Does God hear silent prayers? You bet He does. There are a lot of times when we are so full, or just have no idea what to say.....He knows our hearts. "We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS. (emphasis mine!) Romans 8:26
Pray! Pray! Pray! Be it silent or on your knees with your hands raised to heaven and shouting out your words...or silently in a closet.....HE HEARS!
As I was reading my bible last night, I came across the story of Hannah. She was married to a man, Elkanah and she was one of his two wives. The other wife had bore him children, but, alas, Hannah had not. In this story, it seems that Elkanah had a deep love for Hannah and she prayed constantly for a child even promising her God that she would gladly turn her son over to Him all the days of her young son's life, if God would just bless her with a child.
Hannah was in the temple praying one day and Eli, the priest noticed that here was this woman and he could see her lips moving but NO SOUND was coming from them. 1 Samuel 1:13 tells us that "Hannah was praying in her heart, and her lips were moving but her voice was not heard." Eli thought that perhaps she was drunk. She had to tell the priest that she was praying!
How many times have you been driving in the rain and silently prayed that God would get you through all the traffic, accident free? I have numerous times. When your child has just dangled on your last nerve, how many times have you silently prayed to God to help you maintain a semblence of control? My hand is raised again! I can quote you hundreds of times that my own mother has silently prayed over things and gotten answers from God.
If we go back to the story of Hannah, early in the chapter it tells us that God had closed her womb. Later, as she lay with her husband, it also tells us that "..the Lord remembered her." (vs. 19) Now, if silent prayer goes no where....HOW did God remember her prayer and what she had asked for? Did Hannah indeed get pregnant and give birth to a son? Yes, she did! If God closed her womb, isn't it only reasonable for we christians to believe that HE was the one that reopened it! Hannah was quick to give the Lord the glory..."I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of Him." (1 Samuel 1:27)
I am and have always been a person that prayer is a very personal thing. I enjoy praying and think that I have a good prayer relationship with my Father. I am not always eloquent in speech and have felt uncomfortable praying out loud in front of a large group of people. "But when you, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you." (Matthew 6:6) It stands to reason that if my omnipotent God "sees" all that is done in secret, then He most assureedly HEARS what is said in silence. I will go so far as to challenge this particular pastor.....If you or any other christian is THINKING an impure thought and you do not VERBALIZE it....does God hear that? I somehow do not believe that He is just going to let it slide if it is thought or said in silence.
Does God hear silent prayers? You bet He does. There are a lot of times when we are so full, or just have no idea what to say.....He knows our hearts. "We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS. (emphasis mine!) Romans 8:26
Pray! Pray! Pray! Be it silent or on your knees with your hands raised to heaven and shouting out your words...or silently in a closet.....HE HEARS!
Move Toward The Light
So, you've read the title and you're thinking, "Oh no...she has written a piece about death when you are in that in between state and someone is telling you while you are in the tunnel, move toward the light." WRONG! This is not about death at all. On the contrary, it is about life and love and warmth!
We live in the parsonage right next door to our church. There are many things that I love about this old house that was built in the 40's. There are wood floors throughout the downstairs. I love just sitting and looking at them immediately following a good Murphy Oil Soap scrubbing....they just gleam. I love the big kitchen window that I can look out and see the church as I wash dishes. I could go on and on, but there is one special thing in this house that I love above all others. I have an intense fondness for the fireplace.
Ken and I married in the month of August and as we all know, there is no need for the warmth of a fireplace in the dead of summer. We have two recliners that sit side by side directly in front of the fireplace and we enjoy just sitting there together daily after we have put Nevaeh to bed and we have devotions, we talk or just simply sit holding hands while watching a favorite television show.
When winter arrives, I start getting excited because I know that I am going to get to light the fireplace. This year as the Christmas season approached, I hung our three stockings and put the little Christmas village on the mantle and whenever I lit the fireplace, it just exuded a cheerful glow. If I had been out and was just returning home and saw that crackling fire, I threw down whatever I was carrying on the nearby sofa and rushed over to the fireplace. I would just stand in front of it and bask in the soft heat.
There are times when I wake in the middle of the night and I may be thristy and so, with all of the lights off, I am flailing about trying to get to the kitchen, reaching for anything familiar to get me to where I need to go. At last, as my eyes orient to the dark, I make out the light of the microwave's time and breathe a sigh of relief, because I now have something to move towards.
Ever see those bug zapper lights that everyone hangs on their porches during the summer? Every few seconds you will hear that zzzzzz sound and instinctively know that another bug, after being drawn to the light, actually lost their life.
The point that I am trying to make here is simply this...we as humans, are drawn to light. We are in need of warmth. Physically, a fireplace can provide that warmth to our earthly bodies. It feels good to stand in front of it and "warm" ourselves, but the moment that we walk away, there is that little let down when that chill kicks in, isn't there?
As christians, we all have that light living in us. "For God, who said, 'Let light shine out of the darkness', made His light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ." (2 Corinthians 4:6)
People are drawn to light. Let your light shine from within. There are going to be days that you are not feeling so "bright and cheery" and may even be tempted to keep the light switch turned to OFF. We cannot afford to do that. I pray to God to allow my light and yours to shine so bright that it will be like moths to a flame. Do not keep your light lit only during certains seasons of life, as I do my fireplace. Warmth is needed 365 days a year to those that are hurting, lost and in great NEED of the comfort that only those that possess the LIGHT from within can give.
Can you be that light for 2009?
We live in the parsonage right next door to our church. There are many things that I love about this old house that was built in the 40's. There are wood floors throughout the downstairs. I love just sitting and looking at them immediately following a good Murphy Oil Soap scrubbing....they just gleam. I love the big kitchen window that I can look out and see the church as I wash dishes. I could go on and on, but there is one special thing in this house that I love above all others. I have an intense fondness for the fireplace.
Ken and I married in the month of August and as we all know, there is no need for the warmth of a fireplace in the dead of summer. We have two recliners that sit side by side directly in front of the fireplace and we enjoy just sitting there together daily after we have put Nevaeh to bed and we have devotions, we talk or just simply sit holding hands while watching a favorite television show.
When winter arrives, I start getting excited because I know that I am going to get to light the fireplace. This year as the Christmas season approached, I hung our three stockings and put the little Christmas village on the mantle and whenever I lit the fireplace, it just exuded a cheerful glow. If I had been out and was just returning home and saw that crackling fire, I threw down whatever I was carrying on the nearby sofa and rushed over to the fireplace. I would just stand in front of it and bask in the soft heat.
There are times when I wake in the middle of the night and I may be thristy and so, with all of the lights off, I am flailing about trying to get to the kitchen, reaching for anything familiar to get me to where I need to go. At last, as my eyes orient to the dark, I make out the light of the microwave's time and breathe a sigh of relief, because I now have something to move towards.
Ever see those bug zapper lights that everyone hangs on their porches during the summer? Every few seconds you will hear that zzzzzz sound and instinctively know that another bug, after being drawn to the light, actually lost their life.
The point that I am trying to make here is simply this...we as humans, are drawn to light. We are in need of warmth. Physically, a fireplace can provide that warmth to our earthly bodies. It feels good to stand in front of it and "warm" ourselves, but the moment that we walk away, there is that little let down when that chill kicks in, isn't there?
As christians, we all have that light living in us. "For God, who said, 'Let light shine out of the darkness', made His light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ." (2 Corinthians 4:6)
People are drawn to light. Let your light shine from within. There are going to be days that you are not feeling so "bright and cheery" and may even be tempted to keep the light switch turned to OFF. We cannot afford to do that. I pray to God to allow my light and yours to shine so bright that it will be like moths to a flame. Do not keep your light lit only during certains seasons of life, as I do my fireplace. Warmth is needed 365 days a year to those that are hurting, lost and in great NEED of the comfort that only those that possess the LIGHT from within can give.
Can you be that light for 2009?
I Will ALWAYS Dance!
I wrote this during a very difficult time in my Christian walk....
This blog may make sense to only my church family and the ordeal that we are going through at this time. However, I think that there will be a hint of wisdom (not mine by God's) in my words that others will relate to, at least that is my prayer.
After visiting with my mother and sister tonight, as I was driving home from Clarksville to Erin, I was fiddling with the radio trying to find something pleasant and relaxing to listen to on that long stretch of road. I readily admit that I am not the biggest fan of country music, but I do like one song in particular that Garth Brooks sings, "The Dance." As I drove and I thought yet again for what seems the millionth time about the situation our poor church is going through, the song came on. I listened closely to the words and felt this love spring up in me anew.
"Looking back on the memory of the dance we shared beneath the stars above, for a moment all the world was right...." it goes on a few more lines and then my favorite part of the song is...."I could have missed the pain but I'd have had to miss the dance."
Looking back on this whole harsh experience, it has reopened old wounds that I thought were healed. It has taken me back to another time when I thought that all was right in the world. Being transported back in time when you have been mistreated or been shut out of the "inner sanctum"....stirs emotions within one, and if not very careful, could close one's heart to the ONLY ONE that truly came up with Open Hearts, Open Minds and Open Doors, the slogan of the Methodist Church.
Coming to Erin United Methodist Church restored my faith in people. I have bonded with and felt a deep connection with my family here. They wrote the book on how to make others feel welcome when you walk through that door. Long ago, I could have written off the church and been on my merry way. However, as Garth sings, I could have missed the pain, but I would have missed the dance. Every Sunday that I walk into our precious church, the dance begins. My dance card is never empty. Before I ever leave the parsonage, God is the first to sign up and HE carries me through each dance with each individual partner.
Over time, God has given me a new song in my heart and it gives me joy. It is like my fiddling with that radio and finally, that perfect song comes on that speaks to you and makes you want to tap your foot and pat your hand to the beat on the steering wheel. You do the seatbelt samba!
As I mentioned, at the beginning of all of this, there was pain that was unfortunately renewed...but, it did not last long. "You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing to You and not be silent." (Psalm 30:11)
We are all going to go through trials and we may lose our rhythm and not hear the song as clearly as before...but in Jeremiah 31:4 we are told "I will build you up again, and you will be rebuilt....Again you will take up your tambourines and go out to dance with the joyful." God is faithful and will never leave us in our pain or suffering.
"...a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance." (Ecc. 3:4)
God is asking, "May I have this dance?"
This blog may make sense to only my church family and the ordeal that we are going through at this time. However, I think that there will be a hint of wisdom (not mine by God's) in my words that others will relate to, at least that is my prayer.
After visiting with my mother and sister tonight, as I was driving home from Clarksville to Erin, I was fiddling with the radio trying to find something pleasant and relaxing to listen to on that long stretch of road. I readily admit that I am not the biggest fan of country music, but I do like one song in particular that Garth Brooks sings, "The Dance." As I drove and I thought yet again for what seems the millionth time about the situation our poor church is going through, the song came on. I listened closely to the words and felt this love spring up in me anew.
"Looking back on the memory of the dance we shared beneath the stars above, for a moment all the world was right...." it goes on a few more lines and then my favorite part of the song is...."I could have missed the pain but I'd have had to miss the dance."
Looking back on this whole harsh experience, it has reopened old wounds that I thought were healed. It has taken me back to another time when I thought that all was right in the world. Being transported back in time when you have been mistreated or been shut out of the "inner sanctum"....stirs emotions within one, and if not very careful, could close one's heart to the ONLY ONE that truly came up with Open Hearts, Open Minds and Open Doors, the slogan of the Methodist Church.
Coming to Erin United Methodist Church restored my faith in people. I have bonded with and felt a deep connection with my family here. They wrote the book on how to make others feel welcome when you walk through that door. Long ago, I could have written off the church and been on my merry way. However, as Garth sings, I could have missed the pain, but I would have missed the dance. Every Sunday that I walk into our precious church, the dance begins. My dance card is never empty. Before I ever leave the parsonage, God is the first to sign up and HE carries me through each dance with each individual partner.
Over time, God has given me a new song in my heart and it gives me joy. It is like my fiddling with that radio and finally, that perfect song comes on that speaks to you and makes you want to tap your foot and pat your hand to the beat on the steering wheel. You do the seatbelt samba!
As I mentioned, at the beginning of all of this, there was pain that was unfortunately renewed...but, it did not last long. "You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing to You and not be silent." (Psalm 30:11)
We are all going to go through trials and we may lose our rhythm and not hear the song as clearly as before...but in Jeremiah 31:4 we are told "I will build you up again, and you will be rebuilt....Again you will take up your tambourines and go out to dance with the joyful." God is faithful and will never leave us in our pain or suffering.
"...a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance." (Ecc. 3:4)
God is asking, "May I have this dance?"
Monday, May 25, 2009
Hope Is Mine
Driving home from Nashville on Thursday night after a very long and arduous day, there was not one part of me that felt at peace. There were a myriad of emotions coursing through my body, none of which even remotely resembled peace. I felt let down, angry and hopeless. When I got home, I went to bed feeling much of the same. The next morning, things were not much better.
I needed a little time and space put between myself and the "circumstance." As I kissed my husband goodbye for the day and drove towards my mother's home, the song from the old sitcom "Cheers" played over and over in my head. I felt the need to be in a place where "everyone knows my name." What better place to run than to your mother? (I do have an answer to that question, but more on that later!) For the better part of the day, my mom was not even there. She went to run some errands, but she turned her apartment over to me. She had lit several soothing candles in her bedroom, changed her linen and even plumped her pillows...all for me!
It is all really very simple. For all of this time, while my husband and I have been living in this pressure cooker and going through this "circumstance," I have quite often felt as if I were in the middle of a very crowded room, screaming at the top of my lungs to be heard and everyone just going on with business as usual. I do not mean our beloved church family, not even for a second. These extraordinary people have not dropped the ball once throughout this whole ordeal. The support and love we have received has been our lifepreserver through it all. No, I am speaking of the higher ups. It is excruciating trying to be heard, when noone seems interested in what you have to say. Just lying in my mother's bed, with all of her things surrounding me, I felt as if I were laying in a cocoon of my mother's love and protection. Even if just for a little while, I felt loved and secure. Driving home, I listened to a favorite preacher of mine on cd and I started to feel that old familiar peace that I once had. It was returning. It hadn't really deserted me, I had let it go. Taking my eyes off of the real Peace Giver and allowing "circumstance" to take over, was the reason I was thrown into this tailspin.
On Saturday morning the first feeling that invaded my body as I awoke was...HOPE! I went into our office and I opened my Bible and staring out at me was Psalm 130. I knew, without a doubt that God felt that once again, He had something to work with. "Out of the depths I cry to you, O Lord; O Lord, hear my voice. Let your ears be attentive to my cry for mercy." (vs.1-2) All along, I had been screaming out to the wrong ones. I was trying desperately to get the attention of those that did not know me or understand one thing about how I was feeling through all of this. But God did. I suddenly felt this enveloping warmth and calmness take over my being.
My eyes are squarely on Jesus and that is where they will stay for the remainder of this "circumstance." No longer will I try to figure it all out. No more second guessing anything. God is in total control. He is guiding and directing and I am a very willing vessel. "I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in HIS WORD I put my HOPE." (Psalm 130:5)
Man will disappoint every time, but my God is where all of my HOPE lies!
I needed a little time and space put between myself and the "circumstance." As I kissed my husband goodbye for the day and drove towards my mother's home, the song from the old sitcom "Cheers" played over and over in my head. I felt the need to be in a place where "everyone knows my name." What better place to run than to your mother? (I do have an answer to that question, but more on that later!) For the better part of the day, my mom was not even there. She went to run some errands, but she turned her apartment over to me. She had lit several soothing candles in her bedroom, changed her linen and even plumped her pillows...all for me!
It is all really very simple. For all of this time, while my husband and I have been living in this pressure cooker and going through this "circumstance," I have quite often felt as if I were in the middle of a very crowded room, screaming at the top of my lungs to be heard and everyone just going on with business as usual. I do not mean our beloved church family, not even for a second. These extraordinary people have not dropped the ball once throughout this whole ordeal. The support and love we have received has been our lifepreserver through it all. No, I am speaking of the higher ups. It is excruciating trying to be heard, when noone seems interested in what you have to say. Just lying in my mother's bed, with all of her things surrounding me, I felt as if I were laying in a cocoon of my mother's love and protection. Even if just for a little while, I felt loved and secure. Driving home, I listened to a favorite preacher of mine on cd and I started to feel that old familiar peace that I once had. It was returning. It hadn't really deserted me, I had let it go. Taking my eyes off of the real Peace Giver and allowing "circumstance" to take over, was the reason I was thrown into this tailspin.
On Saturday morning the first feeling that invaded my body as I awoke was...HOPE! I went into our office and I opened my Bible and staring out at me was Psalm 130. I knew, without a doubt that God felt that once again, He had something to work with. "Out of the depths I cry to you, O Lord; O Lord, hear my voice. Let your ears be attentive to my cry for mercy." (vs.1-2) All along, I had been screaming out to the wrong ones. I was trying desperately to get the attention of those that did not know me or understand one thing about how I was feeling through all of this. But God did. I suddenly felt this enveloping warmth and calmness take over my being.
My eyes are squarely on Jesus and that is where they will stay for the remainder of this "circumstance." No longer will I try to figure it all out. No more second guessing anything. God is in total control. He is guiding and directing and I am a very willing vessel. "I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in HIS WORD I put my HOPE." (Psalm 130:5)
Man will disappoint every time, but my God is where all of my HOPE lies!
The Lifter Of My Head
I was watching Oprah today and to be perfectly honest, it is not a show that I normally watch. I do not have anything against Oprah....just not one of my favorite shows! If I were going to be 100% honest, I would say that I tune into the Maury show most afternoons at 4 p.m. That show is beyond crazy and so full of theatrics, that it is morbid entertainment. I just sit and ask myself over and over, "They have to be getting paid to go on national tv and act like that." (On the other hand, I detest the Jerry Springer Show. Let's face it, that show is like a circus on crack!)
Anyway, the show today was about a family, parents and children each, addicted to heroin. So sad to watch the parents drive 100 miles to score some dope. They could not find anyone to watch their little 13 month old child, so they took him along. They had once owned a beautiful home and cars. The mother said that she had always gone each week and had her hair done and always had her nails done. Now, they had lost all of the "finer things in life." The parents also had two teenaged boys and they, too, were addicted to heroin. They were living in a shelter and yet, somehow, they were still going out daily scoring dope. They had a determination every day of their lives. They woke up, they hungered for heroin and they were sick until they got some.
Today, we got more bad news. While Ken has been prepared to go back to the pulpit on Sunday, we were blindsided by a phone call that threatens to stop that. My first impulse was to lash out at the unfairness and the injustice of it all. Instead, I grabbed a book that I love by Joyce Meyer entitled, "The Secret Power of Speaking God's Word." It was a gift from Joyce Meyer Ministries and it is a little book filled with God's Word that I carry in my purse and from room to room with me. When I speak God's Word aloud in times of trouble, it reminds me of summertime when a pesky fly zzzzz's around my head and I swat it away....I am making the enemy get away from me. Who is the enemy? That is irrelevant. I know what Satan is trying to accomplish. I refuse to give in. I am relentless.
The first question that came to mind was, "What do I say to the church now?" They have been so excited with Ken returning. KEN has been excited about returning. I opened my little book and read..."You, O Lord, are a shield for me, my glory and the lifter of my head." -Psalm 3:3 I refuse to hang my head and worry and allow the thief to come and kill God's plan for my future. The thief will not steal my joy and the thief will not kill my hope. I will continue to go before the throne BOLDLY and ask as a right to my inheritance, for God to get me through this and whatever else He needs for me to do. I will finish the course. There have been times throughout all of this that I have felt discouraged, but thank God, I am finished with the old wilderness mentality. I am finished going around that mountain!
I guess by now you are wondering what the family on Oprah has to do with all of this. I watched each of their faces and felt their total despair. They felt that their only option for happiness was heroin. I praised God for my "drug of choice" to bring me through every obstacle in my life. My wonderful God. I do NOT have to hang my head.....God is the LIFTER OF MY HEAD!
Anyway, the show today was about a family, parents and children each, addicted to heroin. So sad to watch the parents drive 100 miles to score some dope. They could not find anyone to watch their little 13 month old child, so they took him along. They had once owned a beautiful home and cars. The mother said that she had always gone each week and had her hair done and always had her nails done. Now, they had lost all of the "finer things in life." The parents also had two teenaged boys and they, too, were addicted to heroin. They were living in a shelter and yet, somehow, they were still going out daily scoring dope. They had a determination every day of their lives. They woke up, they hungered for heroin and they were sick until they got some.
Today, we got more bad news. While Ken has been prepared to go back to the pulpit on Sunday, we were blindsided by a phone call that threatens to stop that. My first impulse was to lash out at the unfairness and the injustice of it all. Instead, I grabbed a book that I love by Joyce Meyer entitled, "The Secret Power of Speaking God's Word." It was a gift from Joyce Meyer Ministries and it is a little book filled with God's Word that I carry in my purse and from room to room with me. When I speak God's Word aloud in times of trouble, it reminds me of summertime when a pesky fly zzzzz's around my head and I swat it away....I am making the enemy get away from me. Who is the enemy? That is irrelevant. I know what Satan is trying to accomplish. I refuse to give in. I am relentless.
The first question that came to mind was, "What do I say to the church now?" They have been so excited with Ken returning. KEN has been excited about returning. I opened my little book and read..."You, O Lord, are a shield for me, my glory and the lifter of my head." -Psalm 3:3 I refuse to hang my head and worry and allow the thief to come and kill God's plan for my future. The thief will not steal my joy and the thief will not kill my hope. I will continue to go before the throne BOLDLY and ask as a right to my inheritance, for God to get me through this and whatever else He needs for me to do. I will finish the course. There have been times throughout all of this that I have felt discouraged, but thank God, I am finished with the old wilderness mentality. I am finished going around that mountain!
I guess by now you are wondering what the family on Oprah has to do with all of this. I watched each of their faces and felt their total despair. They felt that their only option for happiness was heroin. I praised God for my "drug of choice" to bring me through every obstacle in my life. My wonderful God. I do NOT have to hang my head.....God is the LIFTER OF MY HEAD!
I'm NOT Trying!
When we go through hard times, it sometimes takes us awhile to get things through our own "thick skulls." We pound our heads against a wall so many times, and ultimately what we are left with is....a headache. Why do we seem to be going around and around the same mountain? It never ceases to amaze me that there are trying times in our life that we must go through and our faith is at an all time high. We tend to breeze through one thing and struggle with another. While our faith is not completely lost, it does take a hit. That is what makes us all human.
How many times in my life have I said "I cannot do this, it is just too hard,"? Nothing is impossible for God. There are so many stories in the Bible that I love to read that show against impossible odds, God can make anything happen. I've also read of those people that were intent on making things happen on their own, causing themselves and those they loved great heartache. During the time that they thought they were in control and knew better than God....they were creating a whole other set of heartaches, that had they only waited on God and allowed Him to work....life would have been much happier.
During this difficult, but necessary time in mine and my husband's life, I have found myself at times, TRYING to make things happen and TRYING to handle things on my own. Throughout my times of TRYING....I have come to the realization that I am NOT TRYING any more. When we are so busy TRYING to do things and make things happen through our own power...we are not doing one very major thing. TRUSTING! Leaning on the One that makes things happen.
So, I am not going to keep TRYING....that is quite tiring. I am going to spend my time TRUSTING. God can handle it all. My favorite verse in the Bible is "I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me." Phillipians 4:13
Life is not always pleasant and there are things in life that we would not care to go through....but, we can look at it as a time for spiritual growth. Adversity is a real part of life. If you want to find out WHY we face certain adversities in our lives....just remember, we are more apt to be "clued in" if we respond to the actual adversity correctly! Is there a correct way? You betcha! See it for what it is. Our faith is given the chance to grow through adversity...so accept it. The very things that tend to frustrate and anger us will be met with a calmness and peace, when you just allow God to work.
How many times in my life have I said "I cannot do this, it is just too hard,"? Nothing is impossible for God. There are so many stories in the Bible that I love to read that show against impossible odds, God can make anything happen. I've also read of those people that were intent on making things happen on their own, causing themselves and those they loved great heartache. During the time that they thought they were in control and knew better than God....they were creating a whole other set of heartaches, that had they only waited on God and allowed Him to work....life would have been much happier.
During this difficult, but necessary time in mine and my husband's life, I have found myself at times, TRYING to make things happen and TRYING to handle things on my own. Throughout my times of TRYING....I have come to the realization that I am NOT TRYING any more. When we are so busy TRYING to do things and make things happen through our own power...we are not doing one very major thing. TRUSTING! Leaning on the One that makes things happen.
So, I am not going to keep TRYING....that is quite tiring. I am going to spend my time TRUSTING. God can handle it all. My favorite verse in the Bible is "I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me." Phillipians 4:13
Life is not always pleasant and there are things in life that we would not care to go through....but, we can look at it as a time for spiritual growth. Adversity is a real part of life. If you want to find out WHY we face certain adversities in our lives....just remember, we are more apt to be "clued in" if we respond to the actual adversity correctly! Is there a correct way? You betcha! See it for what it is. Our faith is given the chance to grow through adversity...so accept it. The very things that tend to frustrate and anger us will be met with a calmness and peace, when you just allow God to work.
Resting In His Arms
On Tuesday, we were extremely saddened by the death of a much loved member of our church. Marilyn Langley was indeed an angel among us....she was a huge walking heart! I think that one of the hardest things that Ken and I have ever had to do was sit Nevaeh down and tell her that Miss Marilyn had gone to heaven to live with Jesus. Every Sunday, the minute that Sunday School let out, Nevaeh made a straight path to Ms. Marilyn and Ms. "Coral" Sue. She always had a huge hug for Nevaeh and never let a Sunday go by without a special package filled with goodies. Two beautiful dolls given to our little Nevaeh will be a source of comfort to our little girl for a long time to come! Marilyn never failed to offer support and encouragement to Ken and I during this awful time in our lives. She visited, she called, she sent the most beautiful cards to me that I will treasure forever. She never passed up a chance to express how she felt about Ken, as her pastor and let him know that she had his back! One only has to look at almost every room in our house to see some treasure that Marilyn graced us with. What a beautiful and loving soul. How I will miss you, my sweet friend....knowing that you are now resting in HIS arms, brings all of us so much comfort. I know that Ken, Nevaeh and I now have our own personal angel watching from above!
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